Being Married

I read an interesting article by a therapist about five things that can cause friction in relationships that often lead to separation or divorce.  Here's a brief rundown:

1.  Believing that your aliveness is your partner's responsibility.
2.  Believing that relationships should be easy.
3.  Failing to understand that secrets are lies.
4.  Failing to understand that broken trust can be repaired.
5.  Failing to carve out quality time for your relationship.

This is an excellent list of attitudes to be wary of in a relationship, and points to ways to make a relationship stronger, by avoiding them.  I recognize that many people in so-called mixed-orientation-marriages can have trouble in their relationships.  What bothers me is when the trouble is blamed on orientation, when one of the five above is much more likely the culprit.

Also of interest to me is people who argue against a gay oriented man marrying a woman because the woman could never be fulfilled, never complete with such a man -- which sounds like attitude number 1 above.  It sounds like a dangerous attitude in a traditionally oriented marriage, let alone a mixed one.