First Kiss

I think when I was about 5 or 6 I kissed a girl, but I really didn't understand what it meant back then.  So that doesn't count.  When I was a freshman at BYU, before my mission, there was this girl that I dated some.  I knew it was customary to kiss and I felt like she expected me to.  So, one night I tried it.  The only think I felt was that it was wet and did not excite me at all.  I had no idea why people liked kissing so much.

After my mission, when I was dating this incredible girl, I started to feel like I wanted to kiss her -- not because I thought I would like kissing, but I liked her and I thought it would help us develop a closer relationship.  It took several weeks to get up the courage, and even then it was difficult for me to do.  It turned out it wasn't so bad.  I guess I just needed to actually be in love with the girl.  Now that I'm married to her, I enjoy kissing my wife.  I can honestly say that my wife is the only girl I would ever enjoy kissing.

Would it have been different if my first kiss was with a boy?  I really don't know.  I had been married for some time before I ever saw two boys kissing.  Even though I'm attracted to guys, I still thought it was kind of gross, but it did seem exciting.  In time, I've seen guys kissing in pictures and in real life more, and I don't think of it as gross any more.  But still, it's something that I'm likely never to try.  I love my wife and want to be true to her.  I wouldn't trade her for all the world.  That's an important part of any marriage, regardless of orientation.

So what is my first kiss?  As a 6-year-old kid?  My first try that was not enjoyable?  I think I'm going to count the first time I kissed the girl I eventually married.  That's the first kiss that really matters to me now.