Friday, September 20, 2013

One Benefit of a Mixed Orientation Relationship

I've always been taught that when getting married, couples have this initial period of bliss that wears off after a few months or years, and that the let-down can lead to a "falling-out-of-love" period.  However, I don't think I ever experienced that.  I think that it is one of the benefits of my orientation.
It goes like this.  I've been exclusively attracted (at least sexually) toward males all my life.  When I met my future wife, she was amazing and I liked her a lot.  But I never had that superficial infatuation with her, as I've never had that for a girl.  As I got to know her, I started to develop some feelings of attraction to her.  This was exactly the opposite of what happened with guys.  The closer I became to guys, the more they became friends rather than objects of my attraction.  I suspect that most straight guys have to deal with initial attraction and the developing relationship at the same time, and that this plays a major role in that "falling-out-of-love" thing that sometimes happens.  Since I didn't have that same set of conditions, my relationship with my wife didn't have the same stages of development.  I consider my relationship with my wife to be very strong; it was strong from the beginning, and continues strong to this day.

Of course, I only really know what happened in my own case, and one data point is hardly good evidence for such conclusions.  But this much I know.  I dearly and sincerely love my wife, and wouldn't give her up for the world.  And I feel that my gay orientation actually makes that stronger.

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